Pressure Turns You Inward

Whenever we are under pressure, our natural response is to fold inward as a self-protective measure. In essence, we become focused on our own wellbeing and survival. Consequently, we develop coping strategies that center around our own needs at the moment.

While all of this is natural to being human, it also causes us difficulty when our self-absorption isolates us from others. This is especially troublesome for those who aspire to lead. As a leader, it’s really a challenge to balance your own wellbeing with that of your followers. Often, the solutions you come up with for your survival could adversely impact those you lead.

For instance, when you are under pressure, what does that do to your availability? What does it do to your patience? What does it do to your attitude? All of your coping strategies may work for you but may be troublesome and actually add stress to those you lead.

Connect When Pressured

As you organize your world to manage your pressure and stress, make sure you consider the pressure, stress and needs of others, especially your followers. For instance, taking the initiative to consistently reach out to them would be helpful—not just for work updates or their schedule next week.

Ask, How are you doing? How are you really doing? Are you managing ok? Is there anything I should know? How can I help? This kind of questioning shows that you are reaching beyond yourself and demonstrates that you care for them and they matter to you.

I remember a time when talking about care for others wasn’t a thing for the workplace (yes, I’ve earned my thinning gray hair). In fact, demonstrating a caring interaction was often chided as being soft and not necessary. The overall mindset was that this is work, not a family reunion. Don’t bring your personal life to the office.

Connecting Reduces Pressure

We now know that people respond positively when they feel like they matter to their leader, beyond getting work done. They are energized, willing to put forth discretionary effort and commit to the task at hand. Leaders who want that kind of effort from their followers will also have to extend their interactions beyond just work conversations.

Interestingly, this concept flows in both directions. Those who are less senior can and should lead with the same demonstration of care to those more senior to them. Staff can inquire how their manager is doing; managers can inquire how their partner is doing.

If you don’t typically approach others this way, it may feel a bit awkward. But it only takes a couple of check-ins and it will feel more normal. Remember, we are all human and we respond positively when we feel cared about.

Having read this Message, who comes to mind that you should reach out and check in? Will you do it? Will you make the effort to lead under pressure?